Dentists

Dentists. Not many people enjoy them. Most people need them. Dilbert is the only one who does not. Bananas also do not need a dentist but that is beside the point. The main thing that I find unsettling about them is that their job is to stab our teeth and gums with tiny metal pointy rods. Parents bring their children that they claim to love "to the moon and back" and then send them with a stranger who puts them in a in a big uncomfortable chair, where they lay in agony as a dentist pokes tiny metal spears in their mouths. 

They then proceed to ask questions about school and family that no one was prepared to answer. To make it worse they continue to prod your mouth with needles while you're trying to answer. Next, they spray water in your mouth with a tool only to suck it out immediately with another tool. One second you're like "Yes please, water, so thirsty from breathing through my mouth for the last twenty minutes" then bam! It's sucked out of your mouth. They repeat this torture many times. 

Sometimes they'll stick a large, uncomfortable piece of plastic in your mouth and take a picture of the inside of your mouth so that... you can see how your teeth have changed over the years! ...woohoo... I mean seriously, is that really that important? We need to know what we need to fix, not how it happened! 

When they're done they bring you to a little box that has some dollar store plastic toys for the kids. This is of course to make up for them implanting a tracking device in your teeth. Except only the kids get toys because teenagers and adults deserved to have tracking devices planted in our heads because we are lame. Kids on the other hand, rock!

It seems to me like they are just trying to seem like they are doing something smart and helpful when in reality all they are doing is implanting spy technology in us and washing their hands a lot.